Destiny
by Chungdoo
Summary: The final book in the feelings saga!


Destiny

By Chungdoo

Chapter 1

2 months after the events of Passion

Ashoka's POV

Jedi Knight Ashoka tano's personal recorder

CAUTION: only designated force signatures will be granted access

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Welcome Jedi Knight Ashoka Tano, to begin recording simply state begin and when you are finished simple state terminate.

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"Begin"

Monday

The visions came again. As much as I wanted to admit that they were just dreams, I couldn't fool myself for long. Ignorance is a gift and mine had since passed. I knew it was a vision because I kept having the same one. I would go to bed sometimes with Anakin and sometimes without and I would have it and I would wake up to arms and legs covered with sweat, to pillows damp and arms shaking. And I would tell myself that it was a bad dream and I would lie back down. Sometimes Anakin would comfort me, most times I was by myself and as I lay on whatever it was that would serve as my bed I would try and forget. I never forgot. I just placed it in the back of my mind to be dealt with later. And later was night.

It was killing me inside, the dream. It was turning my heart to stone and the weight caused by the transformation was making it hard for my blood to flow and for me to breathe.

How I wish it wasn't true. Whishes are nice.

Murder, it always started off as murder. Innocents, a group of them, slain by a blue lightsaber. Anakin had a blue lightsaber. The children had tried to fight back but it was useless. They might have well have just stood there, prisoners waiting for the black hooded executioner to come and end them. They would always say the same thing "Master skywalker" they had called him. Anakin's last name was Skywalker.

I was forced to watch them now, their faces as the betrayal shone clear through, night after night. How they were slaughtered. And each night I would wake up with a jump. The first couple of nights I had screamed, now I don't. I have become accustomed to them now. I feel terrible for that fact. I want to feel terrible, like I did the first time I ever viewed it, but all of the emotion has left my body after the first couple of viewings and now I just wake up, my face wet with tears and my body shaking.

Life is cruel.

This is true. I have seen these visions and I know that it is him who does these things and I cannot bring myself to speak off again. Yet even though I know he did this, or will do this, I cannot bring myself to end it. To leave him without a proper reason. To terminate a relationship that has brought me so much happiness, all because of a thing that may or may not happen. I hate being alone.

I despise being on missions by myself.

When I am left alone on missions I always think about this, even if others surround me I am still very much alone. Even his presence is no longer enough to keep the visions away. I am no idiot; I know that the events of this year, even the next few months, will change everything. One does not need to be a Jedi master of the council to see this. However I continue to stay with him, because I love him, and I can change him. I must.

"Terminate"

Tuesday

I am beginning to see more of the vision now, only tidbits of the events that will unfold and I still hold out hope that I will be able to save him. I pray that the figure in the black mask and cape is not he but with every detail revealed it is more apparent that all my hopes of saving him will be for not. It seems that the future is both an irresolute yet stubborn thing.

I have been throwing up again. I pray that it is a cold or the flu and not what I fear it is. I am too afraid to try and confirm my suspicions because if it turns out to be true my whole view would change.

The visions have only increased in their frequency and I fear that I may have one during the waking hours, the face of the traitor my judgment. I still cannot see his face, and so my hope that it is not him continues to strive. However with each vision come a little more, pieces of information that was not presently there. So soon I will believe that my hope will either be confirmed or denied. I fear I am only in denial for I know they addressed the traitor as "Master skywalker" but he is my love so I must remain hopeful. If it means I have my heart broken then so be it, for now I am not ready to accept that he is this person.

So far it has only been murder, first the murder of the children, their faces have now come to haunt my every thought and I find it hard to concentrate on my tasks. I pray there are no more; I fear I may not be able to take anymore.

I must go now… thinking about this has become painful of late.

…I'm afraid.

"Terminate"

Thursday

The sickness is getting worse and I fear that what I had previously thought had been correct. I had the strength the first time, I do not have it the second.

The vision has gotten clearer and I can see every detail of the black mask and suit now, but the person behind it remains a mystery. I have heard the voice and that too holds no connection with anyone or anything that I have encountered. My hopes were raised at this possibility. However I know that this is not enough to conquer my suspicion. I feel tonight will be critical and I pray I have the strength to wake up after tonight.

I have asked the Jedi council for more time to allow me to complete my mission. They agreed and have allotted me the time I require. I have finished my task 2 days ago. The task they sent me on. Not my own.

I must sleep now, the eyelids are growing heavy and I am morbidly eager to find out the answer to my question.

Please don't let it be him

……please

"……terminate"

Authors Note:

Hi everyone, I'm sorry for taking so long in updating but I have been crazy with school and work and debate that I have not been getting enough sleep. I am going to try and complete this book before the end of thanksgiving break but then again I may not even get chapter 2 done. Thank you everyone for being so patient with me. To give you some hope I will tell you this, I will complete this story and finish my saga (this is the last book out of 3) so even though it may seem like I have abandoned it, I haven't!!


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